Spy Wine Cooler: Red
Brewer: Siam Winery Co Ltd
One of my friends in Australia was obsessed for a mercifully short period of time with creating a “lolly pie” by melting down lolly snakes (or Gummy snakes for my American readership) and then pouring the resulting lukewarm mash into a blind-baked pie crust. If I had intervened at some point and suggested pouring the hot candy sludge into a cheap 4 litre cask of red wine, the resulting candied wine beverage would be named Spy Red.
The initial nose of American grape jello with a hint of latex did not augur well. On tasting, the lightly carbonated faux-grape and raspberry syrup made me realize that if red Jelly Babies could urinate, I now know where they would. The 6% alcohol by volume is completely submersed under the weight of the sugar and synthetic additives.
The small label on the bottle is curiously informative, offering a practical recipe if you were keen replicate Spy Red in your own home:
Wine 50%
Sparkling Water 41%
Syrup 8.7%
Citric Acid 0.2%
Natural Flavours 0.1%
Location: Most larger drink stores, Cambodia-wide
Price: Unknown, unceremoniously dumped at my house after a barbecue.
If this wine cooler was preferred by an enslaved mythical race, it would be: Oompa Loompa
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September 26th, 2006 at 1:36 pm
No, no, no.
DO NOT under any circumstances drink this muck.
One mouthful is enough to put a charging rhino into a diabetic coma.
Yuck, I will drink 99% of the worlds beverages that contain alcohol, this swill falls into that very rare 1%
September 26th, 2006 at 2:31 pm
One flavour down, 6 to go!
Although I’ve only seen it on their website, there is a Spy Black. I’m hoping that it will be stout confection.
September 26th, 2006 at 3:28 pm
A friend of mine pointed out that the word spy means “vomit” in Swedish, which is a rather appropriate irony in this case.
Austin
September 28th, 2006 at 9:55 am
If red Jelly Babies could urinate! I wish I’d said that. In fact, I think I will, over and over again until I can trick myself into believing that the line is mine. Gold, Phil!
December 13th, 2006 at 4:06 pm
Please send me more info about your “Spy Red”.
Thanks.
ST Lim
West Malaysia
August 29th, 2007 at 12:49 am
I found this posting after seeing your picture of Spy Red on flickr. When I saw that someone had named a beverage after me, I was thrilled. Then I read the review, and was sad. Still, I’d love to get my hands on some, just to have a few bottles around my office. If anyone knows how to get some in/to the U.S. please write to me. - Agent Red, OUT.